Did you hear a
Could it be our most recent release has dislodged good old
Billy Shakespeare from his long and mouldy complacency?
Or could it be he heard, through some
ethereal grapevine what Kat and I have in store for THIS posting?
Maybe...because it suddenly got very
cold around here...No, I KNOW it's late October, but we're here in the SOUTH...just across the state line from
Pensacola, Florida. Cold is not something we get this early...And to prove it let me check my
Ladybug thermometer given me by my sister
Rosebug. It's seventy-two degrees outside...hardly cold enough to explain that blast of ice.
Hmmm... Billy, if you're here, you might want to take
a hike...now before my guest today arrives. I guarantee she will
melt your chill right out of you and then what? What happens to a
ghost who loses his chill?
Gonna stick around huh...well don't say I didn't warn you...
My guest today is one of the central stars of L.J. and Kat Holmes' first collaborative Muse Book,
HER LAST DAY. I have admit it took a LOT to get my guest to come and sit still for this interview...you have no idea the logistics we battled with...But allow me to introduce Su. Many of you know her as
Mount Vesuvius but she likes to be called Su. Welcome Su.
belch erupts from Su's mouth she qucikly and with an embarrassed flush covers.
Su: Please forgive me. I had a bit of the
Blue Ridge Mountains for lunch and now I've got a bit of indigestion.
L.J.: Sorry to hear that.
Su: Yeah...it's a pain in my
magma chamber I can tell you. When that stuff gets riled look out!
L.J.: So I've heard. Su you asked to be here...getting you here proved challenging, but now that you're here can you tell my readers why it was so important?
Su: We have an
underground network that lets us know when there are rumblings about us and I heard that you and your daughter were churning up issues about something I did a very LOOOONNNNNGGGG time ago. So I wanted to come and tell y 'all the truth.
L.J.: (Shaking my head I look into her fiery center.) You didn't bury Pompeii
Su: Oh yeah! Course I did. but
L.J.: YOU erupted but it wasn't your fault?
Su: Of course not. I'd been building up a case of indigestion for well
Think about it...year after year my kind keep gnawing on the earth's mantle with no way to...you know relieve ourselves. It's not like there's a
bathroom we can hop over to, toss our cookies, or relieve our angry guts like you humans do. What do you think you'd do if you couldn't high tail it to a bathroom when your innards are rumbling?
L.J.: I must admit I never looked at it that way.
Su: See...it really wasn't my fault.
L.J.: But your uhmmm spit-up killed one quarter of the people living in Pompeii at the time, not to mention those you killed in Herculaneum and Stabiae.
Su: When humans get drunk and then have to pull their cars over to toss their cookies on the roadside how many bugs do you think YOU kill?
L.J.: Hmmm A good point, Su.
Su: Of course it is. You look at what happened through the
eyes of a human, but for me it was nothing more than my gut needing relief. Do you think about the bugs on the ground you
barf onto when relieving your guts? Of course you don't. All you think about is your need for relief. That's all I was thinking about...and you know it's not like I didn't give those foolish Pompeiians plenty of warning. How many times did I shake the ground when I was trying to find a comfortable position to ease the pressure in my gut?
L.J.: As I recall a lot.
Su: Damned straight! I didn't WANT to empty my sour belly onto those people, but when you gotta toss your cookies, you gotta toss your cookies.
L.J.: I can't argue with that.
Su: You know it! But I will say the rumblings I've heard about
HER LAST DAY are accurate and excellent. Makes me wish I had eyes so I could kick back and read it. You humans are lucky that way. All I can do is sit over there in Italy and continually munch on the
mantle. Which, by the way, is one reason I was glad you accepted my request to come here and be interviewed by you. It's breaking the monotony.
L.J.: Have you been enjoying yourself, Su?
Su: For the most part. I discovered there some metal contraptions attached to your Blue Ridge Mountains I've never tasted before. Sorta tastes like corn,
but different. Made me a bit woosy so I scampered over to your Atlantic and left some of my cookies in your ocean. Figured you'd appreciate me not burying one of your port cities.
L.J.: Yes. Thank you Su. Not sure how I'd explain you being here to my government.
Su: Yeah...for some reason I seem to upset governments.
L.J. : Is there anything more you want us to know Su.
Su: Actually it's more of a question I have for you. You humans visit us and climb up to
yell down at us, so tell me, are you asking us to belch at you? I'm very confused by that. On the one hand you're upset I buried Pompeii when I had indigestion, but you trek up my sides and yell into my center like you want me to belch again. What is that all about?
L.J.: Uhmm I'm not sure I know how best to explain that, except it's humans tempting the
Fates and hoping the Fates aren't really listening.
Su: (letting out a puff of smoke.) Well, that's just plain stupid.
L.J.: Yes, it is. I see by the
clock on the wall our time is just about up. Is there any last thing you want to share with my readers?
Su: Yes. As one of the stars of HER LAST DAY I think they should all rush to their nearest e-book seller and buy a copy. It's a great story. Just remember it was NOT my fault.
And there you have it...the very first AMERICAN visit from Mount Vesuvius...and as she said
HER LAST DAY is a book you really can't pass up.
I want to thank Su...and Billy I think that puts Kat and I
on you. I don't recall YOU ever interviewing a temporarily dormant volcano.
HER LAST DAY is available at Muse It Up Publishing, Inc where the best of e-books take their first bows.